There are only two kinds of programming languages: those people alwaysbitch about and those nobody uses. ― Bjarne Stroustrup

Everything you've learned in school as "obvious" becomes less and lessobvious as you begin to study the universe. For example, there are nosolids in the universe. There's not even a suggestion of a solid. Thereare no absolute continuums. There are no surfaces. There are no straightlines. ― R. Buckminster Fuller

Hand, n.: A singular instrument worn at the end of a human arm andcommonly thrust into somebody's pocket. ― Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary"

All successful newspapers are ceaselessly querulous and bellicose. Theynever defend anyone or anything if they can help it; if the job is forcedupon them, they tackle it by denouncing someone or something else. ― H.L. Mencken, Prejudices, 1919.

We cheat the other guy and pass the savings on to you.

Even the future comes one day at a time. ― W. Woodhouse

Q: How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?A: Two. One to hold the giraffe and the other to fill the bathtub with brightly-colored power tools.

Whom computers would destroy, they must first drive mad.